It's good news that the university's historic Old Main is going through a renovation. Everyone has their UA Old Main story and a love for the old building. In my family, there's a story about my great-Uncle E.D. Herreras sweeping the floors of the university's first building working his way through school. My fav is from my cousin watching a guy walking and reading a book at the same time during finals whobumped right into the mutant cactus because he wasn't watching where he was going. Hilarious.

The Range got the following bulletin from the UA Communications' site (which is now called UA@Work instead of Que Pasa. Hey, what happened? Too many new staff without basic Spanish skills?):

It's been six months since the construction fences went up around Old Main, but there is still plenty of work to be done before the project's slated deadline of next summer.

Construction and restoration work is scheduled for completion in the summer of 2014 with the building ready for occupancy for the fall 2014 semester. It is anticipated that the renovated building will house senior administrative offices and core student services. Local firm Sundt Construction Inc. is the design-builder for the project and the overall cost is budgeted for $13.5 million, which the University will cover with donated funds.

Peter Dourlein, assistant vice president for UA Planning, Design and Construction, said the biggest obstacles so far have been related to the fragile and sensitive nature of the building.

"We are working with a structure that over 120 years old and it is an extremely delicate and incremental process that requires patience and flexibility," Dourlein said of Old Main. "One has to carefully peel away layers and years of additions while seeking to preserve and reuse as much of the original building as possible."

Six months and an entire school year denying freshmen their own Old Main experiences during their first year? No mutant cactus adoration? No dips in the fountain to cool off when no one is looking? For shame.

But The Powers That Be have put together a webcam so we can watch the project take place. Only problem is the location of the webcam. It's just so, so ... faraway.

Here's the link to the live webcam. But can I make a suggestion? I want the damn camera a little closer. Maybe in the building, or switch it up a bit. If not, we need some nude cyclists cruising through from time to time. Can I get an hallelujah or at least a heads up when some streakers on wheels roll by?

Excited to accept job as afternoon host for @foxsports910 in Phoenix http://t.co/zkfMk6XwMx Will have much more to say on Mondays Happy Hour
— Jody Oehler (@jodyoehler) August 23, 2013

Jody Oehler, the host of ESPN Radio's Happy Hour afternoons for seven years and 2011 Best of Tucson winner, is leaving for Phoenix's Fox Sports 910 AM to host their afternoon show. The station recently took over University of Arizona sports, so Oehler's addition makes a lot of sense, even if it means he'll likely have to start pretending the Cardinals are worth discussing on a daily basis. Can't have it all, I suppose.

Just like there are many ways to skin a cat, there are also infinite approaches to playing slot machines.

For some, it's betting the most you possibly can each pull in hopes of hitting some big score. For others — like my mother, the minimum bet master — if you're frugal enough you can make $20 last all day, while at the same time gorging yourself on free soft drinks and maybe consuming an entire pack of smokes.

And for others, it's more a matter of making a wide berth around any and every machine that promises riches for as little as one penny (but wagered in 40- or 50-cent increments, mind you) because there's no way you can win on those things, right?

Whatever your approach is, throw it out the door if you happen to be at Casino del Sol between 12 and 5 p.m. Saturday. That's when you have a chance to qualify for the 2013 Game King Championship Video Poker Tournament.

Yes, a tournament on a slot machine.

Such tourneys are all the rage in Las Vegas, where an entry gives you a fixed amount of time and a pre-set number of credits to go apeshit and try to end up with a higher balance than anyone else. Payouts vary, depending on the tournament.

The Casino del Sol tourney has a $5,000 prize pool, which might not seem like much in the grand scheme of things. But remember, it won't cost you a thing to play.

To enter, anyone who has a Club Sol card (which can be gotten for free) can get a chance to play a session of video poker slots on the DoubleDown Casino, an online social gambling game that is accessible through Facebook and with whom Casino del Sol has had a working relationship for the past year or so. The top 90 or so scorers in Saturday's qualifying move on to the tournament finals on Sunday, where they'll join five people who won entry via the online game.

The online winners also got an all-expenses paid trip to Tucson for the tournament. I know, and we have to live here for free.

To help you get ready for the big tourney, check out this 10-minute (!) video chocked full of strategy and tips. And if that doesn't whet your whistle, there's like 2,000 more on YouTube.

On tonight's AZ Illustrated Politics: An interview with Congressman Ron Barber about comprehensive immigration reform, the future of the Rosemont Mine and more. Then Tucson Hispanic Chamber of Commerce President Lea Marquez-Peterson, Tucson Tea Party founder Trent Humphries and former Pima County Democratic Party chairman Jeff Rogers talk about the news of the week, including a National Republican Committee resolution opposing a path to citizenship for undocumented people as part of immigration reform, yesterday's Ninth Circuit ruling blocking a state law that would have prohibited Planned Parenthood from receiving state funds for health-care services and more. Tune in at 6:30 p.m. tonight on PBS 6.

The Humane Society of Southern Arizona presents Romeo, a 6-year-old, domestic, short-hair, male cat.
Reference no.: 754604

Make way for Romeo! This handsome ham always races over for attention and jumps in your lap the moment you invite him. As a bonus, he gives the world's best hugs! Not only does Romeo adore people - He’s a born diplomat among other kitties. When he’s not attracting admirers, Romeo enjoys exploring, collecting toys and relishing the fact that he’s the sweetest bundle of fluff you’ll ever snuggle. Romeo came to the Humane Society of Southern Arizona with all four paws declawed and he arrived pretty stressed. Now that he’s relaxing in staff offices, Romeo is cool as a cucumber and happy as a clam. This easygoing and well-mannered guest is a legendary favorite who charms absolutely everyone. If you would like to meet this special lover boy, please call (520) 327-6088 to schedule a date with this Hidden Gem. HSSA is located at 3450 N. Kelvin Blvd.

Dear Weekly readers who e-mailed today asking if this piece floating through the interwebs could be true — did the Guv sign off a new gay to straight conversion curriculum called People Can Change set to start in all Arizona public school beginning Nov. 1?

No. Not happening. It's satire, just not Onion satire.

But yeah, I feel your pain. This is Arizona and we're prepared for anything to happen. So sad a citizenry we are that this sets Southern Arizonans in a panic. But shit, doesn't mean it won't happen. In Arizona, anything crazy is possible.

From the National Report that set the remaining reasonable people in Arizona in a panic today:

Arizona Governor Jan Brewer who signed off on the the ‘People Can Change’ program told CNN she is excited about the program. “I think this will be an amazing opportunity for gay children to finally learn who they truly are for once in their lives,” Brewer said. “Can you imagine how much more productive these ‘now-straight’ children will be not always being bullied or wondering why god made them defective? What we have done here today is monumental. I can only hope and pray that other states follow suit.”

Sheriff Joe Arpaio who runs some of the toughest jails and prisons in the country applauds Brewer’s decision. “Less gays in our jails makes for a smoother running prison system. There will be no more prancing around along with all the other gay activities that homosexuals like to do,” Arpaio said. “More importantly, we as parents can now sleep a little better at night just knowing there will be less gays out there wandering the streets trying to molest our children. I’m excited about this and I know all Arizonans are too.”

Folks at People Can Change even went out of their way to post a "this is satire" disclaimer at the top of their website:

The satirical website National Report has issued a FAKE news story alleging that People Can Change programs have been adopted by Arizona public schools. Its own disclaimer admits, "All news articles contained within National Report are fiction, and presumably fake news."

In fact, the spokesperson is fake, the interview is fake, the photo with Arizona Governor Jan Brewer is fake, the press conference is fake — and the quotes are fake, rude, and demeaning of gays.

This satire is not reflective of our organizational values, including compassion, understanding and respect for all who deal with or have ever dealt with homosexuality, however they may choose to address it in their lives. (See Mission and Philosophy.)

People Can Change does not provide programs or services for minors. We are a peer-led support organization of men who have personally experienced significant change from unwanted same-sex attractions ourselves and who now share our experience and give support to other adults who voluntarily seek similar change.

There are no words to accurately capture the weirdness of Pulsebeat, a 1984 film designed to take advantage of the moment when Jazzercise and Jane Fonda ruled,but you'll have the chance to experience it yourself on Monday at the Loft.

From the Loft's blurb:

Along the way, we are treated to WAY too much slow motion showering, pointless nudity, sex on gym equipment, wacky (and aerobically questionable) dance routines featuring lots of jiggling and dangling body bits and a supposedly tense finale in which scores of spandex-clad airheads compete in such categories as “Best Aerobic Trio Routine” for the title of National Aerobithon Champion!

What more could you ask for? Showtime is 8 pm, with general admission tickets $3, a buck less for Loft members.

• Photo courtesy of Shutterstock
• Note, this is probably not the actual man wearing suspenders.

I understand the peril of having to come up with content on demand, so I'm sympathetic to the fact that every column by Sarah Garrecht Gassen isn't going to be scintillating (she definitely a sharp thinker and a good writer), but today, she takes on the troubling fact that ads seem to follow you around the internet these days. In her case, she looked up something on an online store selling suspenders AND NOW IT'S SUSPENDERS EVERYWHERE:

I search for recipes for quinoa (does anyone really know what to do with it?) and he’s there. The New York Times, the Washington Post, and many others. He’s in the corner, leaning against the porch rail, lasso rope in hand.

He even made a cameo as I tried to find the obituary of a friend’s relative. There he was, offering suspenders of condolence.

This man — not smiling but not smiling in that man model way — has been sporting his suspenders of ubiquity across my online life for days.

Don't worry, there's a larger context. This isn't just the story of the modern state of internet advertising and how something somewhat banal online annoyed a local editorial writer, but a larger question of what is really real online.

Our online selves have the potential to be nothing like us in real life — part of the allure, I suppose. We can “be” whoever we want to imagine ourselves in some ways, but in others we’re increasingly defined by the choices we make, or that are made for us by some magical computer brain....

Suspenders man is part of a larger phenomenon — how easy it is to create these landscapes of what we see, based on what we have already seen.

It’s a tomato soup and toasted cheese existence — my favorite lunch, consumed with remarkable consistency as a child. I know its gooey goodness, its familiarity. I know it will make me feel content because it has hundreds, if not thousands, of times before.

Contentment has its place. But it’s not a challenge. It’s not a thrill. It’s safe. There’s no way to be surprised or expand ourselves with words, art, music, food, experiences we don’t already know. What a limited existence.

She loses me somewhere in there, but regardless, someone should pass on to Ms. Gassen that she can dump suspenders man by clearing cookies, using a privacy mode or a dozen other ways. Or, as someone who makes a living via the ads that appear next to her content, just accept that ad folk are going to try to find largely inoffensive ways to sell you things based on your perceived interests. Sometimes a man in suspenders isn't anything other than that.

• Adam Block/UA SkyCenter
• A close-up of the central region of the Orion nebula, taken with the Schulman Telescope at the UA's Mount Lemmon SkyCenter.

UA astronomers were part of a team that developed a new camera capable of taking the sharpest images ever of the night sky. From the UA News Service:

Astronomers at the University of Arizona, the Arcetri Observatory near Florence, Italy and the Carnegie Observatory have developed a new type of camera that allows scientists to take sharper images of the night sky than ever before. The team has been developing this technology for more than 20 years at observatories in Arizona, most recently at the Large Binocular Telescope, or LBT, and has now deployed the latest version of these cameras in the high desert of Chile at the Magellan 6.5-meter telescope.

"It was very exciting to see this new camera make the night sky look sharper than has ever before been possible," said UA astronomy professor Laird Close, the project's principal scientist. "We can, for the first time, make long-exposure images that resolve objects just 0.02 arcseconds across — the equivalent of a dime viewed from more than a hundred miles away. At that resolution, you could see a baseball diamond on the moon."

The twofold improvement over past efforts rests on the fact that for the first time, a telescope with a large diameter primary mirror is being used for digital photography at its theoretical resolution limit in visible wavelengths — light that the human eye can see.

"As we move towards shorter wavelengths, image sharpness improves," said Jared Males, a NASA Sagan Fellow at the UA's department of astronomy. "Until now, large telescopes could make the theoretically sharpest photos only in infrared — or long wavelength — light, but our new camera can take photos that are twice as sharp in the visible light spectrum."

The Cold War Kids show that was scheduled for the Rialto Theatre on August 18 has a new date, September 20. Your ticket for the previous date is still good for the new one.

We, however, will not be rescheduling our feature on the band which we ran last week, so you'll just have to read it online. Still holds up, however.