Bottom line: God made it.

Except for fossils and gay people, of course.

Stories about education rarely bring up as many interesting questions as this tale of teacher layoffs in Los Angeles.

The Tale, Part 1: Because of budget cuts, teachers were being laid off all over the L.A. school district. The district's seniority policy dictated that last hired teachers would be the first fired.

Question: Is it good policy for seniority to determine the order of teacher layoffs?
Question: In California where school budgets were already low, why should budget cutbacks be so severe that a significant number of teachers need to be laid off? Enough teachers leave the profession or retire every year that districts should be hiring more teachers to fill the vacant positions, not firing staff.

The Tale, Part 2: Schools in lower income areas had more teachers with less experience than schools in higher income areas, so they lost more teachers. In some schools, that meant losing close to half of their teachers, who had to be replaced by staff transferred from other schools.

Question: Why are children from low income families taught by the least experienced teachers?
Question: Since beginning teachers have lower salaries than experienced teachers, do districts compensate those schools by letting them hire more staff members? In other words, are schools staffed using a set teacher-student ratio, meaning more money is spent on students with more experienced teachers, or a constant amount of funding per student?

The three varieties of Whiskey Del Bac largely disappeared quickly, and that's without really any actual retail distribution, but apparently the first batch is apparently coming to an end at Scott & Co. this week (although I remain convinced someone is hoarding a case of the stuff somewhere). Celebrating the local booze, the artisan bartenders of Scott & Co have come up with a a week of cocktails.

Here's what they'll be serving for your drinking pleasure:

MONDAY - “Stravenue” (Whiskey Del Bac’s Mesquite Clear, aperol, cocchi torino, tobacco tinkture) from bartender Jon Holcombe.

TUESDAY - "Fickle Muse" (Whiskey Del Bac’s Mesquite Clear, peach shrub, lemon juice, Dragoon’s Saison Blue) a twist on a French 75 from bartender Eric Evans.

WEDNESDAY - "Fickle Muse" (Whiskey Del Bac’s Mesquite Clear, peach shrub, lemon juice, Dragoon’s Saison Blue) a twist on a French 75 from bartender Eric Evans.

THURSDAY - “Carried Away” (Whiskey Del Bac’s Mesquite Clear, Aquavit cinnamon syrup, lemon juice, mole bitters) from bartender Ryan Saunderman AND “Stravenue" (Whiskey Del Bac’s Mesquite Clear, aperol, cocchi torino, tobacco tinkture) from bartender Jon Holcombe. 

See you there on Wednesday. Possibly the other days as well.

Neko Case has had several homes, the most recent a farm in Vermont. But Saturday night at the Rialto, she seemed very much in touch with the time she's spent as a Tucsonan and the friends she's made here. Occasionally portrayed as seeming prickly, Case was obviously attitude-free on Saturday. She built an easy rapport with the Rialto crowd early on and continued to engage them throughout the set.


Songs from her 2013 release, The Worse Things Get, The Harder I Fight, The Harder I Fight, The More I Love You  powered the set. That record is more than worthy of all its hype; fans cheered their favorites. But the full house was silenced by an as-yet-unrecorded song that filled several hundred eyes with tears. It was an a capella number from the point of view of an abandoned child. Case said it was inspired by a youth service organization run by the wife of multi-instrumentalist Jon Rauhaus. Kelly Hogan provided light touches of harmony as she did throughout the set.

"Hex," a song by Freakwater's Catherine Ann Irwin that Case frequently covers was another show-stopper, featuring backing vocals by Hogan and Carolyn Mark.

Arizonan Rauhouse, a stalwart of Case's band,  was well-known to the crowd, having frequently performed in Tucson with his own band. In addition to playing guitars and pedal steel, he introduced an emerging talent on trombone.

If you don't understand something, the Rugrats probably has an episode dedicated to it. Nickelodeon is streaming the infamous Rugrats Passover episode in honor of the first night of the Jewish Holiday. This highly enjoyable episode was nominated for multiple awards, including the Primetime Emmy Award, and it's an informative, animated delight.

Happy Passover, Macababies.

I fly almost exclusively with Southwest Airlines. I don’t know if it’s because flights are cheap, bags fly free or that one time, they bumped me up to first class and the beautiful flight attendant got me drunk. I guess that was another airline, but I was so drunk I thought I was on a Southwest flight.

Here's a charming video of a Southwest flight attendant working a plane full of people while she disperses that helpful safety information over the hardly audible intercom. I think she would have got a standing ovation if all the passengers weren't buckled in.

She should take her act on the road.

Tonight marks the latest edition of Tucson's final Triple-A baseball game, as the El Paso Chihuahuas wrap up their temporary use of the Kino Stadium as their home field with a 6:35 p.m. clash against the Reno Aces.

Free tickets to the game are available at any Eegee's location, which is as good a reason as any to spend a Monday night at the ballpark watching professional baseball.

Need another? How about this: it's a great chance to make fun of veteran ballplayer Jeff Francoeur for being maybe the most gullible person on the planet, at least in the world of sports.

The 30-year-old left fielder has been in pro ball since 2002 and has spent part of every year since 2005 in the major leagues, most recently with Kansas City and San Francisco last year. He was signed by San Diego this winter, and began the year with the Padres' Triple-A team in El Paso.

That's when the long con began.

Since joining the Chihuahuas Francoeur has been led to believe that pitcher Jorge Arias was deaf, despite this very much not being the case. Apparently, Francoeur is quite the oblivious one, as the 10-minute video put together by teammate and burgeoning young filmmaker Cody Decker explains in hilarious detail.

The House Majority PAC, which supports Democratic congressional candidates, is responding to the LIBRE Initiative's recent TV ads criticizing U.S. Reps. Ron Barber (D-CD2) and Ann Kirkpatrick (D-CD1) with a $365,000 ad buy targeting Republicans Martha McSally (who hopes to unseat Barber) and Andy Tobin, the speaker of the Arizona House of Representatives who is in a three-way race for the GOP nomination to take on Kirkpatrick. The press release from House Majority PAC's Matt Thornton:

House Majority PAC today announced the release of two ads running in both Arizona 01 and 02 congressional districts in response to unfair and misleading Koch brothers-funded ads attacking Reps. Ann Kirkpatrick and Ron Barber.

The ads began running today. The buys are approximately $250,000 in AZ-01 and $115,000 in AZ-02.

“There is no doubt who the Koch brothers want in control of Congress: people who will support their extreme agenda, not stand up for working people,” said Matt Thornton, Communications Director for House Majority PAC. “Arizonans have a right to know about the Koch brothers’ hidden agenda and why they support certain candidates.”

Here's the ad targeting House Speaker Andy Tobin:

Tobin has already responded to the ads with the following emailed statement:

The fact that Nancy Pelosi is using her Super PAC to attack me in April shows just how competitive this race is and how worried national Democrats are that we will replace Ann Kirkpatrick in November. But Arizonans won’t fall for these deceptive ads. Seniors are feeling the impacts of ObamaCare first hand and know that Kirkpatrick is the one who has voted to cut Medicare and reduce the quality of their health care. I want to bring their voices to Washington to be a check and a balance on Nancy Pelosi and President Obama to ensure that seniors are protected from the devastating consequences of ObamaCare. Unfortunately, Ann Kirkpatrick continues to support this horrible law.

Tobin also used the ad to send out a fundraising pitch to supporters.

The Weekly has reached out to Team McSally for a response to the ads.

I'm the last person you'd call a Tucson apologist, but even I'm starting to get a little uncomfortable with all of the bashing our community has gotten from long-running animated sitcom Family Guy.

The latest jab at the Old Pueblo came in Sunday night's episode, when after Lois and the Griffin family were worried that Peter's business trips had made him too intelligent and aloof, they decided the only way to fix this was to send him to America's dumbest city as a way of reversing his smarts.

So, of course, that meant the next scene had Peter walking into a room with a sign that said "Welcome to Tucson," followed by the sight of several slack-jawed and summer-toothed simpletons punching each other in the junk while giggling.

The trip apparently worked, as Peter came home as his old dumb self, declaring that while in Tucson he'd seen a wet T-shirt contest using chocolate milk at the Tucson Philharmonic. Oh, and that Battleship was still in theaters here.

(Stupid writers: we don't have a philharmonic)

This is at least the fourth jab at Tucson in the past two years on either Family Guy or another Seth MacFarlane-made show, American Dad. Past digs include calling this city unnecessary, questioning the University of Arizona's admission standards and a variety of observations about the region while on a helicopter tour.

There have also been clips dedicated toward Arizona's immigration stance and fondness of illegal immigrants, but since that's completely true there's no reason to quibble.

The interwebs, the Twittersphere and everywhere else that "breaking news" can be found nowadays is full of reports today that Aaron Gordon is going to declare for the NBA Draft ... sometime this week.

And the modern streetcar is going to start operating. At some point. Probably. You heard it here first!

Why Gordon's impending decision is suddenly news, seeing as this has been considered a foregone conclusion since he arrived last fall, just boggles my mind.

When he actually declares, that'll be something to report on. For now, though, it's more just a matter of trying to be the first outlet to report on this "expected" move, making sure to cite "sources" that are really just the writer coming up with crap on his or her own and not having to be held accountable.

These same "sources," whom I believe includes your neighbor and the guy who cleans the bathrooms at McKale Center, also believe that Nick Johnson is likely to leave as well, but that Rondae Hollis-Jefferson and Kaleb Tarczewski are coming back. Same with Brandon Ashley, though I don't need a source to tell me that having not played since early February because of surgically repaired foot ligaments is a good reason to remain amateur another year.

Rest assured, Arizona fans: as long as they don't all leave, the Wildcats should be just as good (if not better) for the 2014-15 season. Arizona brings in a 5-star wing in 6'7" Stanley Johnson, another inside bruiser in 6'8" Craig Victory, a prolific junior college scorer in Kadeem Allen, a tiny-but-quick point guard in Parker Jackson-Cartwright and the obligatory 7-foot Serbian-by-way-of-a-private-school-in-Kansas in Dusan Ristic.

Arizona will be ranked in the top 5 in every preseason poll. It's already that way in the way-too-early rankings for 2014-15, including this handy one from a comprehensive sports Web site that includes many great writers including this guy.