Two of Hollywood’s biggest, most lovable stars labor away in the pretty but kind of dumb Passengers, a movie that doesn’t have the guts to be as ugly as it should be.

Chris Pratt plays Jim Preston, a mechanic dedicated to starting a life on a distant planet. He and 5,000 other passengers are in suspended animation aboard a ship taking a 125-year journey. That ship has an unfortunate encounter with a meteor shower, and Jim’s sleeping pod awakens him—with 90 years to go on the trip. What to do, what to do, what to do? Jim gets it into his mind to do a very bad thing, and that’s where Jennifer Lawrence’s character comes into play.

The movie is good-looking for sure, and I really liked the design of the ship. That’s essentially what’s keeping Passengers from getting my lowest rating. That, and the fact that Jennifer Lawrence really can act, even when she’s in a junk-food movie. She can salvage the most mundane of dialogue and almost make it sound good. Almost.

Passengers won’t frustrate you so much for what it is, as for what it could have been. Imagine if somebody like Stanley Kubrick got ahold of this premise. Oh man, that would’ve been a movie to be reckoned with. This could’ve been one of the sickest science fiction epics since Alien. Instead, it’s Cast Away meets Sleepless in Seattle in space. Instead, we get a pretty space opera with a happy ending.

Your weekly look at Casa Video's current most popular rentals.

Magnificent Seven

Loved the education part of Gov. Ducey's State of the State address—with a few exceptions, of course. Great stuff, mostly. Unfortunately, it'll take lots of money to accomplish even half of what Ducey proposed. Lots and lots of money. And he didn't commit dollar one.

My understanding is, the state is expecting to see about $24 million in revenue that's not already accounted for. Even if all that went to education, it only comes to about 7 percent of the $350 million a year voted in when Prop 123 passed, so it's not a hell of a lot of money. I've read that it'll cost the state about $20 million just to cover the extra costs from the minimum wage hike. And of course, education isn't the only area in dire need of additional funding, or the only sector Ducey made financial promises to. So that puny little $24 million, a tiny fraction of the state's nearly $10 billion yearly budget, will have to be stretched way beyond the breaking point for it to make any kind of a difference anywhere.

Here are some of the education proposals in Ducey's speech. As you read them, count the potential costs on your fingers and toes, with each digit worth $10 million. Warning: pretty soon, you'll need to start in on your neighbor's fingers and toes as well. It's gonna take a lot of "This little piggies" to get us all the way to market.

• Increase investment in public schools above and beyond inflation.
• Raise teacher pay.
• Pay down teachers' student debt.
• Create "Teacher Academies" at our universities and community colleges where prospective teachers' educations are paid for and teaching jobs will be waiting upon completion, debt free.
• Give a $1,000 signing bonus to teachers who commit to work in low-income schools.
• Expand full day kindergarten.
• Connect schools in rural areas and on tribal lands to high speed internet and create a statewide coding and technology initiative.
• Increase per pupil funding at excelling schools, with even more going to excelling schools with low income students.

United We Dream has asked educators to "come out this January 9 as an unafraid educator and pledge to protect immigrants in your classrooms and community."

Sign this pledge to commit to taking action the week of January 9th - just a few days before the regime of terror of Donald Trump begins.

You can declare yourself an Unafraid Educator or Unafraid Ally publicly by printing the appropriate sign, putting your name on it and posting it on social media. You can get more information about how educators can help in the detailed and informative #HereToStay Toolkit for K-12 Educators & Schools.

According to the group's website:

United We Dream is the largest immigrant youth-led organization in the nation. Our powerful nonpartisan network is made up of over 100,000 immigrant youth and allies and 55 affiliate organizations in 26 states. We organize and advocate for the dignity and fair treatment of immigrant youth and families, regardless of immigration status.

The new Female Storytellers prompts are up! Pick one and kick off the new year by creating a story to share! All the information you need to get started is on their website.

We all have stories to tell, and much to learn about our characters, including our own, in the telling. Invariably we reveal our own wit, and the tale's own humor. Female Storytellers, from first-timers to national-award winners, attract more than 100 followers the second Wednesday of every month, at 7:30 p.m., at The Flycatcher, 340 E. 6th St.

Here's what's in store so far for 2017: Jan. 11, Choose Your Own Adventure; Feb. 15, Heat of the Moment; Mar. 15, Work in Progress; Apr.12: Choices; May 10, Far From Home; June 7, Play Like A Girl.

But Wait! There’s more!
Last week we shared with you the crazy, crazy comedy grab bag that is Tucson’s thriving open mic scene. This week we’ll take a look at where the cream rises to—curated free showcases featuring the most seasoned locals who are doing some of their personal best work. You can see one almost every week! Just one caveat – these are not professional shows. They are for whatever fun you can get from them and your alcoholic beverage.
The Switch Comedy
The Screening Room
127 E. Congress St.
1st Tuesday
8:30 p.m.; free
Hosts: Pauly Casillas, Alex Kack
NOTE: Combines standup and improv in a unique format

Funny People Being Funny
The Hut
305 N. 4th Ave.
2nd Monday
9 p.m., free
Host: Alex Kack

Brew Ha Ha Comedy Showcase
Borderlands Brewery
119 E. Toole Ave
2nd Wednesday
8 p.m.; free
Hosts: Nick Cerami, Matt Ziemak

Wildcat Comedy
The Screening Room
127 E. Congress St.
4th Tuesday
8 p.m.; free
Hosts: Rich Gary, Matt Ziemak

Comedy at the Wench
Surly Wench Pub
424 N. 4th Ave.
4th Tuesday
9 p.m. show
Hosts: Mo Urban, Roxy Merrari

Laughing Liberally
The Flycatcher
340 E. 6th St.
4th or last Sunday
8 p.m., free
Hosts: Alex Kack, Mo Urban, Phil Gordon

Hi, I'm Lip!

I'm a handsome 1-year-old boy and I need a new home! I was transferred to the Humane Society of Southern Arizona from a different shelter, so they don't know very much about my history.

What they do know is that I'm a big boy and I love to play! I've gotten along well with my kennel mates and love toys. I'm looking for a home where I can get ample play time and exercise, and a lot of snuggles too.

If you have a current dog bring them over to HSSA Main Campus at 3450 N. Kelvin Blvd. to do a doggy meet and greet!

Hope to see you soon!

Lots of love,
Lip (835674)

Paul Verhoeven, who never really recovered from the delicious calamity that was Showgirls (although Starship Troopers was pretty good), tries his hand again at a female empowerment movie (Yes, Showgirls was supposed to be a female empowerment movie) and he fails miserably.

Isabelle Huppert labors away as Michele, owner of a company that makes terrible videogames. As the film begins, we see her victimized in a graphic assault scene that Verhoeven revisits again and again throughout the film. Michele takes an unconventional approach to the event and, as the mystery of who the assailant is plays out, the movie goes off the rails with weirdness.

I guess Verhoeven is shooting for satire here, but what he winds up with is a ragged, less glossy rehash of eighties flicks like Jagged Edge.

It’s a bad mystery movie that’s trying to be shocking and even funny, but it all feels desperate and trashy. Huppert is a great actress, and she does all she can with what she’s given. Verhoeven, on the other hand, has basically lost it. Actually, he lost it a long time ago. Maybe another director could’ve made the strange elements balance out, rather than having all feel exploitive and wasteful. I hate movies that revel in their cleverness when they are totally not clever. I also hate that the movie tries to explain Michele’s behavior towards her assailant as a product of her violent past. Also, you’ll guess the killer long before the movie is half over. This is garbage.

I noticed it just won the Golden Globe for Best Foreign Film, so I guess I’m just a big, grouchy baby going against the grain on this one. Then again, it’s the Golden Globes.

January is a time for new beginnings and new pledges. But it is also the time of year that I think most about the shooting that killed six of my constituents, injured 12 others, and put a bullet through my head.

Six years ago, on a bright Saturday morning, our community was forever altered by a young, disturbed man who should have never had access to a gun. Innocent lives were taken and countless others will never be the same.

In the aftermath of the tragedy, our city united as one Tucson. People of all different backgrounds came together to cry, to mourn, and to heal. We have bonded over the values we all share. And as a result, our city is stronger than ever.

Like our city, my life has also changed a lot since that horrible day. Speaking is still really difficult for me. My eyesight isn’t very good, and despite hours of grueling physical therapy, my right arm and right leg remain mostly paralyzed. But one thing that hasn’t changed is my desire to help and serve others.

Service has always been an important part of our community’s fabric. We Tucsonans help our neighbors in need, we care for those who are less fortunate, and we all give back to the community we love in our own unique way.

Those values inspired my friend, Judge John Roll, to pursue a law degree at the University of Arizona, join the legal system, and serve our state and country with great distinction for over 35 years.

Those values helped shape Dorothy Morris, who is affectionately remembered for her devotion to her family and concern for others.

Those values led Phyllis Schneck to spend hours knitting sweaters for students at nearby Cragin Elementary School because she worried the children would be cold in the winter.

Those values encouraged a courageous nine-year-old girl, Christina-Taylor Green, to step forward and run for student council at Mesa Verde Elementary School.

Those values called Dorwan Stoddard, a retired construction worker, to the Mountain Avenue Church of Christ, where he spent hours volunteering his time to keep the church looking its best.

And it was those values that motivated my friend and former staff member, Gabe Zimmerman, to pursue a career in public service, and courageously run towards me in the face of gunfire, as I lay bleeding on the ground.

Over the past six years, I have thought a lot about why I survived when these wonderful people, who brought so much goodness into the world, did not.

I still don’t have a good answer.

I often remind myself of something Abraham Lincoln used to say: “The Almighty has His own purposes.” While I still cannot make sense of this terrible tragedy, I can only hope that this horrible event was not merely random. That something positive can come from all of this so that no other family or community has to endure another senseless tragedy like ours.

And that is why I wake up each and every day grateful and determined to make the most of my second chance at life and service. Along with my husband Mark Kelly, I have worked to make sure our leaders finally do something about the 33,000 Americans who die every year from gun violence.

Like my recovery, progress has been painfully slow. But regardless of the pace, to me, each small step means more children will be able to enjoy holidays with their parents, and more parents will be able to enjoy seeing their children grow up.

Together, we’ve worked with leaders from both parties to help keep guns out of the hands of the dangerously mentally ill by strengthening the background check system to include more mental health records.

We’ve worked in state houses across the country to pass laws that protect women and their families from domestic abusers with guns.

Since the tragedy at Sandy Hook Elementary School, 42 states have passed over 160 new gun safety laws that help protect the rights of law-abiding gun owners, like Mark and me, and keep guns out of dangerous hands.

As I travel across the country to push for responsible laws and support bipartisan leaders who have advocated for commonsense action, I carry the memories of those who were taken in the Tucson shooting with me. And I pledge to do my best, each and every day, to honor their legacy by making our country safer.

Congresswoman Gabrielle Giffords represented Southern Arizona in Congress from 2007 to 2012

It's no surprise that a number of TUSD schools lost their magnet status. A magnet school is supposed to have something special about it to attract students who are outside the neighborhood, with the purpose of improving the school's ethnic balance, and the district has failed to meet the court's required goals for the schools. The six schools are Ochoa Elementary, Robison Elementary, Safford K-6, Utterback 6-7, and Cholla and Pueblo high schools. The schools aren't closing, but they will no longer be considered magnet schools.

This is a failure for TUSD and its students, an opportunity lost. Most studies indicate that students achieve at higher levels in more integrated schools, especially minority students. On top of that, society benefits when people learn to know each better other across ethnic lines, and integrated schools are an ideal place for that to happen.

However, there's another side to the story. TUSD is, depending on how you look at it, in good company or bad company in its failure to integrate its schools. The famous 1954 Supreme Court case, Brown v. Board of Education, made it unconstitutional for states to demand that schools be segregated, but across the nation 68 years later, segregation has increased since 1970, and there are few signs that trend will turn around any time soon. Recently I did a reasonably extensive online search looking for urban school districts whose integration efforts could be called successful. Few came even close to qualifying. One of the rare exceptions is the Jefferson County Schools in the Louisville, Kentucky, area. The way it has succeeded is by creating a county-wide school district, then dividing it into 13 separate clusters, each containing an economic and ethnic student mix, and even this successful plan nearly collapsed any number of times due to intense public pressure. There may be a case of an urban district which has successfully desegregated its schools using the magnet school model, but I haven't come across it.

Charter schools, by the way, tend to be more segregated than district schools, so going with charters isn't a deseg solution.

With the opening of Airmen Memorial Bridge, eastsiders now have an option to avoid the fustercluck intersection of Grant/Kolb/Tanque Verde roads: A direct link between Kolb and Sabino Canyon roads.

The $12.3 million RTA project was controversial—some of the neighbors living west of Udall Park were fiercely opposed to plan—but the idea was to reduce traffic at Grant/Kolb/Tanque Verde by creating a new bridge over the Pantano Wash. The route should also reduce the number of people who need to head north by turning left at the intersection of Tanque Verde and Sabino Canyon roads.

The new bridge is named for 18 airmen who died following a mid-air collision of two B-24 Liberators on a training mission over the Pantano Wash on Nov. 30, 1944, according to city spokesman Michael Graham.