Crime happens every day. No matter how many police officers patrol the streets, no matter what other prevention efforts are undertaken, it's going to happen. There's no way around it.

All we can hope for is that the cops catch the bad guys, and in some cases, shed some light on some rather interesting (read: non-intelligent) individuals.

So, with that in mind, we bring you the father-and-son (alleged) bank robbing duo of 44-year-old Steven Caplinger and 21-year-old Destin Jordan, who earlier this week were arrested by Tucson police on suspicion of commiting at least eight local heists since late October.

• Tucson Police Department
• Steven Caplinger

• Tucson Police Department
• Destin Jordan

According to TPD, the two were busted on Jan. 3 after Caplinger allegedly robbed the Tucson Old Pueblo Credit Union at 9725 E. Broadway. This was apparently the second time Caplinger had gone to that branch, and according to TPD hitting the same place more than once was a trend.

Caplinger is alleged to have robbed the Commerce Bank at 2285 W. Ina Road twice in the span of a month, and the Wells Fargo at 555 N. Wilmot Road twice in five days late last year, TPD said.

Nearly all of the robberies involved a man wearing University of Arizona apparel (Rule No. 4 in the bank robber's handbook: change your gear, dude), which police say might have contributed to an 88-CRIME tip called in last month identifying Caplinger as the robber.

While Caplinger is believed to be the actual robber, his son is accused of assisting in at least one heist by serving as a getaway drive, TPD said.

In Charlton, Massachusetts, the local library sent two cops to shake down a five year old for her two overdue library books. This is where the police state begins, people. Maybe Ron Paul is right about everything.

However, I also sense a sequel to that Paul Blart movie in the works.

[The Daily What]

Justin Fenton, a crime reporter for The Baltimore Sun, noted this strange (and sad) intersection of reality and television last night. He reached out to Wire creator David Simon, who called the incident "coincidence, completely", so this Omar Little probably doesn't have a "get-out-of-jail-free" card from testifying in Bird's murder trial.

Keep an eye out, Tucsonans, and help some of Tucson's best musicians retrieve their instruments from the hands of thieves.

From Gabriel Sulllivan's Facebook page:

My van was broken into Saturday night on 15th st. between 6th ave and Stone. My guitar, Brian Lopez's guitar, and Geoffrey Hidalgo's bass were stolen. They were....

-Airline Town & Country DLX electric guitar. Tan color with black pickguards and a lot of tone/volume knobs.

-Gibson Les Paul Standard electric guitar. Cherry sunburst finish. There is a crack in the back of the headstock and green glow paint stained on the back of the guitar.

-Fender Precision electric bass. Black with black pickguard.

So. uh. Yeah. Keep an eye out.

While Loren Grigsby should probably be thankful that he didn't receive the maximum sentence of 65 years that he could have, the former Davis-Monthan airman who plead guilty to charges of distribution of marijuana, money laundering as part of distribution of marijuana and conspiracy to distribute marijuana learned that the military doesn't mess around with that sort of thing:

During the court-martial, the 23-year-old Airman pled guilty to all charges, providing the military judge with detailed facts concerning each offense. The facts revealed the member laundered over $147,000 as part of a cross-country marijuana distribution enterprise. The member would ship marijuana through the United States Postal Service to Georgia from Arizona in return for large cash deposits spread out over multiple bank accounts. This criminal activity, which occurred from March 2010 to June 2010, was uncovered as part of a large investigation which included the combined efforts of the Air Force Office of Special Investigations, the Tucson Police Department, the Federal Drug Enforcement Agency, the United States Postal Inspection Service and the Internal Revenue Service. During the investigation, law enforcement agencies seized over 26 pounds of marijuana.

After three days of testimony, a jury of officers and enlisted members sentenced Senior Airman Grigsby to a Dishonorable Discharge, to serve 17 years in confinement, to be reduced to the grade of E-1, and to forfeit all pay and allowances. The maximum sentence in the case was to receive a Dishonorable Discharge, to serve 65 years in confinement, to be reduced to the grade of E-1, and to forfeit all pay and allowances.

As if trying to drive on the freeways the day before Thanksgiving wasn't frustrating enough, the Arizona Department of Public Safety has decided to slow things down a bit.

To the speed limit, to be precise.

Operation Safe Passage, as it's been dubbed, will put a truckload of extra DPS officers on interstates 8, 10, 17 and 40 — what, no love for I-19 — the rest of Wednesday and overnight, all in hopes of cutting down on speed- and alcohol-related crashes.

According to DPS, last year's Wednesday-before-Thanksgiving saw 12 fatal wrecks, which killed 13 people.

DPS says it will have one of its vehicles stationed every 10 miles on the abovementioned freeways where they go through rural areas, while in the urban corridors that will drop to every two miles.

So, if you were planning on making the 100-mile drive from Tucson to Phoenix tonight in just over an hour ... well, you've been warned.

• Illustration Ryn Gargulinski

Although I’ve actually worked in the insurance industry, I don’t recall agents flocking so madly on prospects. I do recall words of warning from my insurance agent boss who always said insurance agents were only about a half-rung higher than used car salesmen on the food chain. Since he was the coolest boss I ever had, although I think he’s still irked over how I fled to New Mexico to pursue journalism, I never believed him.

Now I just might.

My first mistake in the insurance seeking process was believing one of those websites that said they could get me a handful of competitive quotes in about 10 minutes. I needed competitive since my existing policy was up for renewal — at about triple the rate with which I started.

The carrier had pulled the same stunt with my car insurance, slowly snaking up the rates until I was paying enough to insure a fleet of school buses rather than a single vehicle that pretty much does nothing but sit in the garage. I switched car insurance companies and cut my rate by about one-third. I figured I’d do the same for my house.

So I merrily went to my new car insurance carrier and asked for a home insurance quote. They wanted nearly double the amount of my existing carrier’s renewal rate. That’s when I was sucked into the competitive website thing.

• Illustration Ryn Gargulinski

Dang. We were really looking forward to a dead smoker with chest staples perched atop the autopsy table, a guy exhaling his smoke through a hole in his throat and seven other drastically gross and graphic images meant to deter people from buying cigarettes.

The idea is squashed, at least for the moment, thanks to a temporary injunction issued by U.S. District Judge Richard Leon. He ruled the images, which were approved by the FDA and set to consume the top half of every pack of cigs, go beyond freedom of speech.

"It is abundantly clear from viewing these images that the emotional response they were crafted to induce is calculated to provoke the viewer to quit, or never to start smoking — an objective wholly apart from disseminating purely factual and uncontroversial information," said Leon in his opinion that spanned nearly 30 pages. He also noted some of the images had been enhanced to further glorify their gore.

On the surface, the idea of riding a bus from Phoenix to Milwaukee to meet up with a woman you met on the internet for a threesome she organized seems like a great idea, but for one 18 year old it ended with two days tied to a bed and three hundred knife wounds:

A Milwaukee Police Department search warrant for the East Knapp Street apartment where the man was held details his ordeal. The warrant authorized cops to seize an assortment of items from the residence, including “knives or other cutting instruments,” blood and DNA evidence, duct tape, restraining devices, and “Books or literature relating to Satanism or the occult.”

The police investigation began Sunday night after cops responded to a report of a possible stabbing. Officers found the Arizona man “bleeding from the neck, arms and back.” He told cops that after arriving at the home of a woman he met online, he “was bound and was stabbed numerous times over a timeframe of what he described as ‘two days.’”

The man was transported to a local hospital, where medical personnel “estimated the number of wounds to be in excess of 300,” according to a search warrant affidavit sworn by Detective Michael Walisiciwicz. “He suffered multiple puncture wounds as well as lacerations and slash wounds to his back, face, arms, legs and neck,” noted Walisiciwicz.

[...]

While at the apartment building, police were approached by Rebecca Chandler, 22, who stated, “I think you are here looking for me.” Chandler told cops that she had engaged in sexual relations with the Arizona man “and that the cutting was consensual but that it got quickly out of hand.”

Apparently, the black market is as wide-ranging as Amazon or Overstock.

It’s no longer just a place to get weapons, drugs, kidneys and healthy babies. It might also be the go-to shopping destination for those in need of … desert plants.

About 150 barrel cacti were discovered stolen Monday morning from a cactus farm near South Kolb and East Valencia roads, according to the Pima County Sheriff’s Office. When deputies arrived at the scene they found a large hole in the property’s chain link fence, along with tire tracks going in and out of the property.

Also missing: a backhoe, presumably to help haul said cacti out of the establishment.

PCSO is asking for help in finding these items, as well as the people involved. So, needless to say, if you see a backhoe moseying down the road with a bunch of cacti in its scooper, call 88-CRIME.