I'm going to throw this out there: the world has about a million problems worth being concerned about before getting upset about Justin Bieber's haircut, but Tempe's own King James only preacher Steven Anderson apparently disagrees.

[HT: Christian Nightmares]

From the New York Times, since there's apparently nothing else important happening in the state:

There used to be two kinds of homeowners in this scorching city, those with dazzling green lawns irrigated by sprinklers and those with more natural backyard expanses of rocks, cactuses and desert flora, which required no watering at all.

Many homeowners' associations in Arizona require either desert landscaping or green grass, which requires extensive watering.

Now, though, the grass may be greener next door simply because of a fresh coat of paint.

Homeowners’ associations in this arid region typically have rules requiring residents to maintain either desert landscaping or green grass, with brown lawns not an option.

This is the time of year, with summer approaching and the winter grass dying out, when letters typically go out to homeowners reminding them of the rules and making it clear that violators could face fines or even legal action should their lawns take on an unsatisfactory hue.

The pressure to keep grass green has prompted some residents to try money-saving shortcuts, the most innovative of which is to dye the grass green.

The grass spraying business took off here as the housing crisis escalated and real estate brokers were looking to quickly increase the curb appeal of abandoned properties on the cheap. A lawn painting, using a vegetable-based dye, can cost about $200. Vigorous homeowners’ associations, which can fine owners thousands of dollars if a dispute drags on, have also been good for business, said Klaus Lehmann of Turf-Painters Enterprise.

Doug McGraw, who lives in the Dreaming Summit subdivision in western Phoenix, has been cited for neglecting his lawn. Like many homeowners here, Mr. McGraw saw his finances in turmoil of couple of years back and had no extra money to spend on the lawn. “I just let it go one year, and it went to brown,” he said.

A citation letter arrived from the homeowners’ association.

That is when his wife, tongue in cheek, remarked that if food could be dyed, why not lawns? Mr. McGraw began researching the issue and discovered that those who operate athletic fields and golf courses do indeed use lawn dye to keep their grass green year-round.

Unsure whether this would be allowed by his association, and somewhat embarrassed to be taking the easy way out, he dyed his lawn one night in the spring of 2009 without telling a soul in the neighborhood.

By the end of 2009, when the grass needed a touchup, he painted it by day and even offered to do the same for his neighbors, for a fee. Only one person took him up on the offer, but nobody objected to his quick fix either.

I get it, kids in restaurants are generally a pain, probably especially for the waiters, but slipping a toddler a margarita isn't exactly the best way to handle it.

Police are investigating after a toddler was mistakenly given an alcoholic beverage at an Applebee’s.

It happened Friday around 4:30p.m. at the restaurant on 14 Mile Road in Madison Heights.

Fifteen-month-old Dominic Dill-Reese’s mother ordered him a kid’s meal and asked for apple juice as the beverage.

His mother began to get suspicious moments after he started drinking it. “We took it from him and he kind of laid his head on the table,” said Taylor Dill-Reese. “He dozed off a little bit and woke up and got real happy.” Dill-Reese also said Dominic refused to eat when his food arrived.

Before leaving, Dill-Reese tasted the toddler’s drink and got a big surprise. Instead of apple juice, alcoholic margarita mix was in his cup. “The manager came up to me and he smelled it and he was like, ‘I am so sorry ma’am, I just don’t know what to do,’” said Dill-Reese.

She demanded the manager do something. Madison Heights police was called to investigate the incident and the boy was taken to the hospital.

[HT: GQ]

Great, Arizona is advising megalomaniacs on how to amp up the crazy now? In other news, I'm deleting Celebrity Apprentice from my DVR queue:

Donald Trump is investing more in the conspiracy theories about President Obama’s birth certificate as he explores his own bid for the presidency.

In his latest embrace of the birther strategy, Mr. Trump has invited Tea Party leaders and a legislator from Arizona to his office in Manhattan on Friday morning to discuss a bill moving through the Arizona legislature that would require candidates for president to prove that they are natural born citizens.

The Arizona group said the call from Mr. Trump on Wednesday came unexpectedly, and the group had spent much of the day Thursday scurrying to make travel arrangements to New York.

“Of course I was surprised, who wouldn’t be?” said the legislator, Representative Carl Seel. “I’m honored to get the ability to meet with him and discuss it, and I want to thank him for being such a supporter of this issue.”

In an interview shown Thursday on the “Today” show, Mr. Trump told Meredith Vieira that he had “real doubts” about whether Mr. Obama was born in this country, and that he has sent his own investigators to Hawaii to research the issue. An NBC News/Wall Street Journal poll showed Mr. Trump as the most favored candidate among Republicans who consider themselves Tea Party supporters.

Mr. Obama has shown a certificate of live birth from Hawaii, which is the standard form of birth certificate in the state, and state officials — including the Republican who was governor during the 2008 campaign — have confirmed its authenticity. Several conservatives, including Glenn Beck and Bill O’Reilly, have criticized Mr. Trump for raising questions about it.

But polls show that many Republicans continue to believe that Mr. Obama was not born in this country, and therefore is not eligible to be president.

At some point, the internet has run out of descriptive names for websites, so often there'll be some sparkling new website with a title missing a vowel somewhere and I'll have no idea what I'm going to be looking at. This is a source of much anxiety for me.

Thankfully, there are no such issues with Ridiculous Pictures of Celine Dion. That's all the site has, and there's plenty of source material.

Enjoy.

I probably should have coughed up the money to watch the highlight of the sports entertainment calendar Wrestlemania last night, but thanks to the internet, cheapskates everywhere can see the end of Snooki's match, where she put on a shockingly competent show:

FYI: It's not your fault if things that make you feel uncomfortable come up on the internet...it's not your fault.

[GQ]

This guy just wants to bring the joy of music through a performance of the sax solo from Wham!'s "Careless Whisper" and the establishment wants to bring him down. A shame, really.

[The Daily What]

Charlie Sheen is hiring this summer:

Do you have #TigerBlood? Are you all about #Winning? Can you #PlanBetter than anyone else? If so, we want you on #TeamSheen as our social media #TigerBloodIntern!

This unique internship opportunity will allow a hard-working, self-motivated, creative, resourceful and social media savvy individual to work closely with Charlie Sheen in leveraging his social network. The internship will focus on executing a social media strategy that will build on the success Charlie Sheen has attained in setting the Guinness World Record for the fastest time to reach one million followers on Twitter. The #TigerBloodIntern is expected to be proactive, monitor the day-to-day activities on the major social media platforms, prepare for exciting online projects and increase Charlie’s base of followers.

You will learn how to promote and develop the social media network of Hollywood’s most trending celebrity.

Let the New York Times introduce you to the Native Society:

On a frigid Friday night in February, about 150 preppy young men and women, mostly friends from the Upper East Side, turned out at the Plaza Hotel for a fund-raiser.

Foppish scions in their 20s ascended the grand marble staircase, and sipped champagne in couture gowns, velvet dinner jackets and tuxedo slippers rakishly embroidered with Chinese characters. Those disinclined to formal wear still looked clubbable in Burberry check jackets, bow-ties and Hermès scarves.

Set against the intricately patterned oak parquet floors and the robber baron-luxe red velvet sofas of the Rose Club, the affair took on the air of Mrs. Astor’s Four Hundred — if Mrs. Astor had been conducting a casting call for “Gossip Girl.”

But this was no ordinary cotillion. The black-tie party was for the Native Society, a new club that is limited to native New Yorkers, many of them city dwellers who might reside in 10021 — the ZIP code of upper Park and Fifth Avenues — or be graduates of certain prep schools.

“You can’t apply,” explained its founder, Oliver Estreich, 24, the son of an architect and interior designer who grew up on East 85th and Park Avenue. He formed the society in October with a few friends from prep school whom he refers to as his “administrators.” It quickly grew to several dozen, mostly by word of mouth, and now claims nearly 400 members.

“It’s the second-degree-of-association,” Mr. Estreich said. “If one of my administrators knows you, likes you, thinks you have the native sensibility, we’ll reach out.”

[...]

To Anne de la Mothe Karoubi, 24, who went to the Marymount School, it’s an intellectual precociousness. “When you grow up in New York City, our minds develop faster,” she said. “You’re not from Wisconsin, you’re not from the middle of America. We’re international, we’re focused, we’re driven.”

[NY Times]