When Jesus said turn the other cheek, perhaps it was so he could kick your ass.

From a recent New York Times story on Christian cage fighters:

The outreach is part of a larger and more longstanding effort on the part of some ministers who fear that their churches have become too feminized, promoting kindness and compassion at the expense of strength and responsibility.

“The man should be the overall leader of the household,” said Ryan Dobson, 39, a pastor and fan of mixed martial arts who is the son of James C. Dobson, the founder of Focus on the Family, a prominent evangelical group. “We’ve raised a generation of little boys.”

These pastors say the marriage of faith and fighting is intended to promote Christian values, quoting verses like “fight the good fight of faith” from Timothy 6:12. Several put the number of churches taking up mixed martial arts at roughly 700 of an estimated 115,000 white evangelical churches in America. The sport is seen as a legitimate outreach tool by the youth ministry affiliate of the National Association of Evangelicals, which represents more than 45,000 churches.

Good morning, Monday! Time to celebrate.

The U.S. is lifting a 21-year ban on haggis. Read all about it right here.

Lostfans, preparing for the final season, are petitioning the show's parent company to help keep the TV show's spirit alive.

They're asking Disney to turn Tom Sawyer Island into a Lost-themed island trip to Dharmaville.

These childhood-crushing transformations aren't new; Swiss Family Robinson's Tree House is now Tarzan's Tree House; the Pirates of the Caribbean got a makeover and a Captain Jack; and Adventure Though Innerspace (the one with the big 'ol eyeball staring at you) is gone.

The online petition is asking that the island be transformed into a Lost ride that could include the following:

The Frozen Donkey Wheel behind the Orchid Station testing chamber
The Swan station and Hatch ride
A submarine ride to Palu Ferry
Dharmaville Barracks
Smoke monster
Ruins
Jacob's Cabin
The Egyptian Statue and Jacob's Lair

If you're equally upset that it's the last season and don't want the island fun to end, sign up here. I imagine the Smoke Monster feature could become a favorite with the kids when it drags Aunt Opal or a baby sister into the bushes.

Just when I thought Facebook was OK, I got this friend suggestion on the right corner of my screen.

I've been dragged into our local Build-a-Bear Workshop countless times, but I never realized this corporate pit contributed to my son's growing obsession with saving the planet. Lucky for me there's Big Government. The conservative Website brought to my attention this video posted on the company's interactive game Website buildabearville.com.

...when your unsuspecting tot logs on and hops a virtual train to the North Pole…you should know that he or she will be informed — by Santa Claus — that Christmas may be canceled this year due to Global Warming.

Needless-to-say, this constitutes brainwashing on the sleaziest and most sinister level. The good news is that this nonsense isn’t coming from our government this time and the rocky economy is our friend here. People, we have the means, if we have the will, to topple these charlatans who shamelessly prey on little children. So boycott Build-A-Bear. And, more importantly, tell the world why.

The ice caps are melting. But I guess it's easier to focus on corporations that convince you it's good to pay $45 for a cuddly doll or bear that comes with accessories and its own cardboard condo, than it is to get real about climate change. Next up: Band-Aid commercials with those cute kids singing about being stuck on Band-Aid brands is actually teaching our children how to advocate for health care reform. Beware.