It's a sad day at Weekly World Central.

Red Star is no longer Tucson Weekly Top Commentor. Food Diva Rita is in the lead. I hope she knows how to handle this responsibility.

You probably don't need to be reminded why we and the beautiful state of Arizona are in trouble. But just in case you do feel you need a reminder, check out this video of Arizona State Sen. Sylvia Allen (R) saying Earth is 6,000 years old.

But it's even more frightening how eager she is about mining and making sure she gets it out there that "you'll never know the mine was there when they're done." Has she ever driven south of Tucson?

In case you want a break from watching Michael Jackson tribute shows or updates on his funeral arrangements, try the Arizona State Legislature's live media service at azleg.gov. Look to the left, and click on Live Proceedings to see if our hardworking legislators are working on the budget. After all, they have until midnight to decide our future, so why not watch and see if any wrestling occurs.?

I'm hoping for a few headlocks. Is that too much to ask?

The lastest from the Arizona Daily Star's Daniel Scarpinato:

With only hours left until the end of the fiscal year, the likelihood of the Legislature passing a budget tonight that Gov. Jan Brewer will sign is still uncertain.

Republicans are openly criticizing the plan in the Capitol hallways. An important Senate committee knocked-down a key element of the package Tuesday morning. And Democrats, having been shut out of the process until now, are turning down efforts to jump onboard.

The compromise was dealt a blow Tuesday morning when the Senate Rules Committee rejected the portion that would have asked voters this fall to support a temporary one-cent sales tax increase. That’s after lawmakers spent all of Monday trying to keep it alive.

This is latest episode in the Republicans’ troubled efforts to pass a budget that Brewer will sign.

Brewer met with House Speaker Kirk Adams Tuesday afternoon, summoning in Democrats for support.

None appeared moved.

Asked if he’d be onboard when leaving the meeting, Rep. Cloves Campbell, D-Phoenix, responded: “What do you think?”

Surrounded by reporters in the stairwell while exiting the building, Brewer would not entertain the scenario of a government shutdown.

Her message to Arizonans: “I’m very hopefully that when they wake up Wednesday morning that we have a budget and that everything is good.”

First Ed McMahon, and then Farrah Fawcett and Michael Jackson the same day. Ed was old, Farrah had cancer, and Michael ... what will happen to his kids?

Friday morning update: Here's a pic, from P.K. Weis.

This just in, from the good folks up in Saddlebrooke:

At approximately 12:43AM this morning the Captain at Saddlebrooke Fire Station 373 was awakened by a popping sound coming from outside his bunk room. He opened his door to investigate and found the communications room at the front of the station fully involved in fire. Before he did anything else he alerted the rest of his crew at the other end of the station where they slept. The crew proceeded to the bay and the engines to prepare to fight the fire, and found the bay was also heavily involved in flame. There was insulation and debris falling on to the fire trucks and beginning to burn the hose and equipment on the truck. The crew quickly decided they needed to get the trucks out of the bay before any other efforts could take place. The fire had caused the power doors to fail and the engines had to be backed out of the rear of the station. It was then that the Dispatchers were alerted of the fire and additional Golder Ranch engines and equipment responded to the fire.

Additional units arrived within about seven minutes at which time the building was approximately 25% involved. Once firefighting operations were underway the fire was contained and under control in just over 30 minutes. There was extensive damage to the front of the building and bays, and the entire structure suffered smoke damage. The station will need extensive renovation to render it habitable again.

All crew members who had been asleep in the station got out safely and did not suffer any injuries throughout the ordeal. The quick thinking of the Captain to first alert his crew to safety was critical to the outcome of the event. The engines and other equipment had minor damage and will be returned to service as soon as the fire district mechanics release them.

The cause of the fire is under investigation at this time.

It should also be noted that Mr. Ed Robson of SaddleBrooke Development has offered 3 Villas for the crews to base out of so that there will be no loss of service and response time to the SaddleBrooke Community.

Temporary Station 373 will be located in the HOA #2 Villas near Holiday and Casual.

I guess they forgot that our entry into fascism was confirmed once habeas corpus disappeared. What are they complaining about now?

If marriage is so sacred, how come Jesus didn't do it?

Caught the Red Elvises at Plush last night in their new formation—Igor and the Red Elvises—sans the other lead singer and his gigantic balalyka (which I missed).

But as I was standing there, I couldn't help but look at Igor twice and notice an odd resemblance to Pima County Supervisor Ray Carroll. Separated at birth? Shared Chicago ancestry?

Next time Igor returns, I think a reunion is in order.

Just don't take MY job!

I have an acquaintance who secretly peed in an urn in an antique shop in Bisbee. He filled it to the brim, while the unaware owner at the cash register remained Prim, Proud and Proper—the three P's in antiquing parlance. I can only imagine the owner's reaction when he discovered the travesty! (I'm thinking of Principal Skinner lamenting the vandalized Springfield Puma.)

Of course, my acquaintance did not defile the urn out of malice. After three Electric Dave's and that cool Mule Mountain wind, he simply had to go, so he relieved himself in the most voluminous and inconspicuous vase he could find. Logical, I guess.

He told me this story while I was having lunch, which somehow made it funnier, as did the fact that he doesn't at all look like a public urination/antique desecration kind of guy.

But it made me think: Haven't we all "held it in" at some point in our lives? Are you doing it right now? Doing harm to yourself by holding in anger, love, truth, guilt, liquids? Denying natural functions and feelings because of social norms just might be the oldest clash in human history. Why do we do it to ourselves? After all, Teddy Roosevelt is rumored to have peed in the saddle, both pragmatically and recreationally. People in New York City piss on everything, and look at how far that's gotten them. Even John Hancock metaphorically golden showered King George with that outsized signature of his.

A long time ago, I relieved myself of law school. I just had to go. It didn't matter that I labored through the LSAT, or that my resume was about to enter a downward spiral. All that mattered was shedding a burden. So, one morning, when I should have been chewing on torts, I got in my car and drove out of town. I drove and drove. I drove until I knew the only way I would ever come back was free: a step down in others' eyes perhaps, but fully relieved nonetheless.