Stavros Halkias has the most proactive promo photo portfolio next to Kristine Levine’s iconic head shot with her dazzling sunglasses and nothing else over her massive mammaries. Our favorite Halkias pic involves an apparent orgasm under a rain of Cheetos, but we ultimately decided not to use it in the admittedly unlikely event this is your family newspaper.

Halkias headlines the Stavvy In Tucson on Sunday, Jan. 20, at The Owls Club. Doors open at 7 p.m. and the show is at 8 p.m. Reservations are $15 in advance via stavtucson.brownpapertickets.com or $20 at the door.

Also performing: Levine, best known for her stint with Portlandia and Doug Stanhope’s film The Unbookables: Phoenix comedian Anwar Newton, who was named the Phoenix New Times’ Best Comedian of 2017 and 2018; and Tucson favorite son and touring comic Chris Thayer, who also produces the show.

Thayer has appeared on Viceland, written for and performed on Comedy Central, been featured in dozens of festivals and podcasts, and shared bills with Patton Oswalt, Maria Bamford, Tig Notaro, Kyle Kinane and others.

Halkias and Levine make Thayer look like Jerry Seinfeld. How did he pick the lineup for this unique show? He says, “I (think) my style may be more dry or subdued than either Halkias’ or Levine’s, but I primarily think of them as comics who are funny. I absolutely think contrast is a good thing on a bill though. Seeing a show full of the same type of comic can be an exhausting blur, but variety on a lineup serves to highlight what’s different and unique about each performer.”

Of The Owl’s Club, which does not normally host comedy, Thayer says: “What’s not to love about a bar in a former funeral home? I love that Owls is mellow and intimate, that it has a separate room for the show, so we’re not springing a comedy show on unsuspecting bar patrons, and that we’re not competing for people’s attention with hundreds of TVs blasting football games.

“Also, the room we’re having the show in feels like a living room.”

Best Damn Comedy Jam

Chicago Bar hosts the Best Damn Comedy Jam at 9:30 p.m. Sunday, Jan. 20. Doors are at 8 p.m. Admission is $13, $8 in advance from the bar. New Jersey comic Kool Bubba Ice heads the bill.

He’s known for appearances on Def Comedy Jam and BET Comic View. Dirty Red and DJ Impeccable open.

Yeah, it was Ducey's State of the State address, I know that. But I'm calling it the State of the Schools address because I'll be looking exclusively at the portion where the governor deals with education, with one quick exception in the next paragraph.

Ducey said Arizona needs to deal with our current and future water shortage problems, but he didn't mention climate change. Because if you're a Republican, you dassn't say "climate change."

Ducey said our public schools need more transparency, accountability and oversight, but he didn't mention charter schools. Because if you're a Republican, you speak no ill of charter schools.

Those moments of cowardice and deflection aside, let's look at what Ducey's education proposals bode for the state.

The two biggest educational issues the legislature should be dealing with are increasing public school funding and adding charter school accountability and oversight. Let's see how Ducey did on those issues.

I hope Ducey has his chiropractor on retainer. His habit of patting himself on the back whenever he talks must wreak havoc with his body alignment. The education portion of Monday's speech was no exception. He claimed to have solved the school funding problem by pushing for the passage of Prop 123, which brings in $300 million-plus a year, and endorsing a bill extending the life of Prop 301, which brings in about $670 million a year. OK, but . . .

Prop 123 filled in a bit of the decrease in education funding over the past few years, but only a bit, and most of the money is being stolen from our children's trust account — the state land trust fund. Boosting the amount of the students' inheritance spent today at the expense of what they'll get tomorrow isn't exactly an act of generosity. (Yeah, it's true, I held my nose and voted for the damn thing, and I'd do it again, but that doesn't mean I like it.)

Extending Prop 301 was necessary, but all it did was keep a six-tenths of a cent sales tax in place which was about to expire. It didn't generate any new revenue for schools.

Find more Claytoonz here.

Southern Arizona Senior Pride Book Club meeting. If you're looking to get together with a group of LGBT seniors on the third Wednesday of every month to talk about a fascinating book, boy do we have news for you: This is your chance! This month's book is The Lavender Scare: The Cold War Persecution of Gays and Lesbians in the Federal Government. You've probably heard of the Red Scare, but not everyone realizes that this was a time when homosexuals were considered just as dangerous to national security as communists, and that the "Lavender Scare" was even more intense and long lasting than the Red Scare. Read all about it, then discuss it with a new group of friends. 2 to 3:30 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 16. Ward 3 Council Office Conference Room, 1510 E. Grant Road. Free. Details here.

Postmodern Dialogue. The David Dominguez Gallery's latest exhibit features paintings on panels by David Pennington, 3D works by Carrie Seid and steel sculptures by David Mazza. Pennington often works with bright colors and street art influences, Seid's art explores the geometry of the natural world and Mazza's sculptures are traditionally abstract. The large gallery in the heart of Tucson's Art District is a gorgeous place to be viewing the work of local artists, and if you're at all interested in contemporary art, you'd be downright silly to miss this one. Exhibit runs through Feb. 23, with a reception on Saturday, Jan. 12. From 6 to 8 p.m. Davis Dominguez Gallery, 154 E. Sixth St. 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Tuesday through Friday and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Saturdays. Details here.

Space Drafts 55: Beyond the Known World. What a wonderful city we live in. At this event, you get to enjoy the great beer of Borderlands Brewery and learn about astronomy from real scientists from the UA Lunar and Planetary Laboratory. Hosted by Astronomy on Tap. 7 to 10 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 16. 119 E. Toole Ave. Details here.


The Man Who Fell to Earth–Director's Cut. Starring David Bowie as an orange-haired, stoic alien on a mission to retrieve water from Earth for his drought-stricken planet, The Man Who Fell to Earth is surreal, fascinating and one of the most 70s things you can imagine. This film went on to influence Bowie's music (particularly his albums Station to Station and Low), Philip K. Dick, Ridley Scott, Watchmen, Guns N Roses and much more. If you thought spiders from Mars was a sci-fi concept, get ready for a whole lot more. Part of The Loft's screenings of the cinema of Nicolas Roeg. 7:30 to 10 p.m. Wednesday, Jan. 16. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. Regular admission prices. Details here.

Events compiled by Tirion Morris, Emily Dieckman, B.S. Eliot and Jeff Gardner.

The Reverend Horton Heat is coming to town and we have a last-minute giveaway for ya!

Enter for your chance to win a CD of the new album Whole New Life signed by the band.

One lucky winner will also win the grand prize of a vinyl record of the album and two tickets to tomorrow night's show at 191 Toole! (Wednesday, Jan 16 at 7:30 p.m.)

Music writer Mark C. Horn highlighted the band's story in the Tucson Weekly music section this week:

For the better part of three decades, that band has spotlighted an alt-music cult legend who is often confused for his band's name. That man is Jim Heath, who—alongside longtime stand-up bass thumper Jimbo Wallace—has entertained his legions of fans with tireless tours up and down the highways and byways of the United States and abroad.

Heath and Wallace, who have weathered the rotation of a few able-bodied double bass drummers over the past 30 years, have a new album, aptly titled Whole New Life, via Chicago-based Victory Records. The band's 12th studio effort—and first since 2014's REV—proves it's never too late to teach an old dog a new trick.

The title of the new release is underscored by the additions of veteran Dallas drummer Arjuna "RJ" Contreras (Eleven Hundred Springs, Grammy-winning nuclear polka band Brave Combo) and precociously slick West Virginia blues piano player Matt Jordan to the mix.

And if that's not enough, Heath has expanded his vocal range to add menacingly fun vocals that are more than road-tested and built for speed in higher registers.

Coming to 191 Toole with their latest incarnation, Reverend Horton Heat will be hitting the Tucson stage to showcase the new album and play old crowd favorites with the newly expanded line-up...     

Read the full story here.

Enter to win:

Education funding and the looming threat of water shortages were among the key issues Gov. Doug Ducey emphasized in his State of the State address in Phoenix Monday afternoon.

The Arizona Republican opened his speech in House chambers at the State Capitol saying, “The challenge before us is to lay the groundwork today to make sure the Arizona of tomorrow remains strong. Doing so requires action now to do the things that matter and secure Arizona’s future.”

But with Democrats gaining seats in the November election, party leaders vowed things will be different in the current legislative session.

Ducey said he was “ready to get back to work” and that both Republicans and Democrats “think there is common ground to work together.” He highlighted some major topics.

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Water

“It’s first on my list,” he said. “We’re in a 19 year drought, and it’s going to get worse before it gets better.”

The governor stressed that it is “time to pass the drought contingency plan, and we have 17 days to do it.”

Arizona and much of the West have been in a drought since 1994, according to the state’s Department of Water Resources. The federal government has given Arizona until Jan. 31 to hammer out a plan to deal with expected water shortages across the vast Colorado River Basin.

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Education

Ducey touted his administration’s achievement of delivering a 20 percent pay raise for teachers after several statewide walkouts last year.

Local author and artist Kimi Eisele remembers Stella Tucker who passed away on Wednesday, Jan. 9. Memorial services will be held on Saturday, Jan. 19 at San Xavier beginning at 9 a.m.

   Tohono O’odham elder and teacher Stella Tucker passed away on January 9, 2019 at the age of 71, surrounded by family. Stella, a mother of three daughters, was known publicly for her work upholding the tradition of the annual baidaj, or saguaro fruit harvest, a tradition she learned from her parents, grandparents, and her late aunt, Juanita Ahil.

Juanita Ahil harvested from desert lands west of Tucson, lands that in 1961 were designated by U.S. Department of the Interior as Saguaro National Monument. That designation threatened the camp as officials initially prohibited the continued harvest. Friends and educators from the Arizona Sonora Desert Museum wrote a letter on behalf of Ahil prompting then-Secretary of the Interior Stuart Udall to grant permission for the harvest to continue.

Stella took over the camp in 1994 after Ahil’s death and received a special permit from Saguaro National Park every year to continue the harvest. (Saguaro National Monument was upgraded to a National Park in 1994.)

For 25 years, Stella received visitors, students, scientists, artists, and family at the camp to share with them the declining tradition of saguaro harvesting and promote the interrelationship between the O’odham people, the saguaro cactus, and the Sonoran Desert. She also taught many workshops at the Arizona-Sonora Desert Museum.

Stella’s primary interest was engaging Tohono O’odham youth in order to keep the tradition alive. She expressed gratitude that her daughter, Tanisha Tucker, had joined her in running the camp and offering workshops. In a 2017 issue of Edible Baja Arizona magazine, Stella said, “It’s a dying culture. One day nobody will know how to do it. I want them to learn. It’s really important to me that they learn and keep this culture going.”

Tina Vavages-Andrew, the Ancestral Ranger at Saguaro National Park, organized educational visits to the camp for nearly 50 schoolchildren and others every year. “Stella was very patient and willing to share the knowledge she possessed. I most enjoyed her personal stories of her harvesting experiences,” said Vavages-Andrew.

Barbara Rose, who runs of Bean Tree Farm and offers workshops about desert foods, met Stella in the mid-1990s when she went to help her harvest saguaro fruit. “Stella shared her homeland so graciously with all who came to Saguaro Camp. We were fortunate to experience her love and care for the desert and its gifts, the sweetness of its fruits. She kept generations of wisdom safe, and now her daughter Tanisha carries that love and wisdom forward. We will miss her,” Rose said.

In 2018 Stella was awarded a Master-Apprentice Artist Award from the Southwest Folklife Alliance in honor of her work upholding, preserving, and teaching the tradition. The award supported her work in passing along the tradition to her daughter, Tanisha Tucker.

Find more Claytoonz here.

Three Nights In Hell. The Loft Cinema is hosting the world premier of this new crime/comedy film, made right here in Tucson. The film tells the tale of three sisters and their trail of death and destruction in a vendetta against a ruthless drug lord. The screening includes a Q&A with the director and writers of the movie after. 8 to 10 p.m. Tuesday, Jan. 15. 3233 E. Speedway Blvd. $8. Details here.

Dante's Peak. Case Video Film Bar is entertaining you and educating you at the same time. The University of Arizona Geoclub is showing up to watch this volcanic thriller starring Pierce Brosnan and Linda Hamilton, and will also answer any questions you might have on lava, rocks, geology or anything else you might want to know about dormant stratovolcanoes. Plus, you basically get to see James Bond fight lava. 7 to 10 p.m. Tuesday, Jan. 15. 2905 E. Speedway Blvd. Details here.  ✖i

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Courtesy of Seis Kitchen

Ameraucana Provisions Pop-Up. Seis Kitchen is hosting a pop-up dinner made by Ameraucana Provisions, a Southern Arizona pop-up restaurant. This six-course meal includes smoked trout roe, baby squash, celery fennel salad, yellowtail, chili, cauliflower grits, and much more. 6 to 9 p.m. Tuesday, Jan. 15. 1765 E. River Road. $75. Contact Ameraucana Provisions for reservations. Details here.

Postmodern Dialogue. The David Dominguez Gallery's latest exhibit features paintings on panels by David Pennington, 3D works by Carrie Seid and steel sculptures by David Mazza. Pennington often works with bright colors and street art influences, Seid's art explores the geometry of the natural world and Mazza's sculptures are traditionally abstract. The large gallery in the heart of Tucson's Art District is a gorgeous place to be viewing the work of local artists, and if you're at all interested in contemporary art, you'd be downright silly to miss this one. Exhibit runs through Feb. 23, with a reception on Saturday, Jan. 12. From 6 to 8 p.m. Davis Dominguez Gallery, 154 E. Sixth St. 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Tuesday through Friday and 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Saturdays. Details here.

Events compiled by Tirion Morris, Emily Dieckman, B.S. Eliot and Jeff Gardner.

Several Tucson eateries are offering free meals to those affected by the federal government's shutdown, including Saffron Indian Bistro and Pastiche Modern Eatery.

Saffron, which is located at 7607 N. Oracle Road, will continue its free lunch buffet offer that they originally offered on Jan. 11 indefinitely, according to the restaurant's Facebook page.

"We know there is a great need to help and there are many people out there still," the post, which went up on Sunday, states. "Thank you to all who have posted their kind comments and have come in to enjoy a meal. We loved meeting with you. We appreciate each and every person. We just want to spread love, compassion and bring a smile. Thank you again."

Pastiche, which is located on 3025 N. Campbell Avenue, is offering free Pastiche burgers or baked mac n' cheese plates from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m., Monday through Friday to all government employees affected by the shutdown.

The midtown kitchen is also offering free non-alcoholic beverages to those affected, stating their desire to help all affected in uncertain economic times.