Tamala 2010

This movie is so cool that if you don’t see it, you might as well just buy a pocket protector, get some Dungeons and Dragons accessories and start voting Libertarian. Seriously. There’s nothing like it, so it’s impossible to compare it to anything, but just imagine if the Sanrio (Hello Kitty!) corporation were run by mod-’60s French DJs who had just been apotheosized. And then they made a cartoon. And look, I hate cartoons, yet this was so far beyond a cartoon that calling it a cartoon is like calling the Buddha an even-tempered guy. Quick plot summary: It’s 3500 BC, and the cult of Minerva has just destroyed the world and been re-born. Then, it’s Renaissance Italy, and someone is delivering mail. Suddenly, it’s 2010 on CatEarth, and Catty&Co controls 97.65 percent of the world’s GDP. Tamala, a 1-year old cat of cuteness, takes her spaceship off to the evil dog planet. Then the god of death swoops down. Colonel Sanders’ robots with axes in their heads walk around hawking meat. A plug is plugged in and nothing happens. A 3D robot cat ascends an escalator. Those Diane arbus twins float by in a balloon. A dog sexually torments a mouse. Then it’s 2032 in Shanghai, and a plot develops. Then … God knows what. I mean, weirdness for weirdness sake is lame, unless you can be this weird. Then it’s art. Unbelievable art. The kind that features a cute kitty drawn in simple geometrical shapes saying things like "Me so tasty! You should eat me!" And you really should.